It is amazing how Clever Quotes get us thinking about the things that matter and teach us a lot. Sometimes when talking to people, you only need one clever quote to drive a message home. You can also use them to make a point, to end a discussion, or to win an argument. Here is a list of Funny Clever Quotes that will help you do all the above.
Top Picks for Funny Clever Quotes
These clever quotes are very enlightening, and they will make you see life in a whole new dimension.
- If you want to lose money, keep chasing women. If you want women to chase you, ignore them and chase that paper.
- Good luck finding greener pastures when you are too lazy to water the grounds you are standing on. When you finally get the greener pastures, you will cause them to dry up. Learn about irrigation!
- Deep will always call unto the deep. So do not waste your time talking to shallow minds. They will make you shallow.
- It is only brilliant minds that refer to problems as challenges. When you have a challenge, you enjoy solving it because it gets your mind thinking. When you are dealing with problems, it will overwhelm you, and you will give up.
- There are very few real people left in this world. The rarer you are, the better your chances of being noticed. So do not be scared to be you. When you become someone else, you will miss your opportunity.
- In life, strive to be indispensable in every area. That is how you know you have made an impact in life.
- If your absence is not felt, you have not made it yet. Invest in the world with your personality. Make notable contributions everywhere you find yourself.
- A kind heart will always give and walk away. But a noble heart will always receive and never forget.
- If you try and fail the first time, try and fail the second time. Try and fail the third time. Keep trying and failing because one day you will get it right. In the process, you eliminate the ways that do not work. You remain with one sure way.
- When life gives you lemons, who told you that you must make lemonade and drink? Throw them out the door because you did not order for lemons. When life finds out you enjoy lemonade; it will not give you oranges.
- Love is not a battlefield; it only finds itself in an already set battleground.
- Until you stop blaming everyone else for your mistakes, you are not ready for success. Only successful people take responsibility for their actions. When you learn to do so, you are one step away from success.
- Being pampered and understood makes us comfortable in our mistakes. Sometimes we need someone to kick and push us for us to outgrow our mistakes.
- Reading a bunch of books and being able to answer questions makes you clever. But being able to apply the knowledge in real life makes you a genius.
- There is a very thin line between judging someone and correcting someone. Sometimes you may have to stand in the middle of that thin life and save a life.
- It is very easy to feel judged when someone points out your mistakes. But only the strong people with strong minds can see the correction and not judgment.
- When someone lifts you up when you are feeling low, they are taking away your abilities to be independent. Being kicked with the truth when you are down, empowers you. You will have to pick yourself up from the ground.
- If you must forget something about someone, forget the wrong things they did to you. If not, you will forget all the good they did for you and to you. That is the real definition of being self-centered and selfish.
- Be generous when you have nothing. You will have no trouble being generous when you have everything. A man’s generosity is measured when they have nothing.
- It is free to think big so stop talking small. Happiness is free, so stop being sad. It is likewise free to smile, so stop looking gloomy. Being free is also free so do not let anything hold you captive.
- To aim, fire and miss do not make you a failure. A failure is one who never attempted to aim in the first place.
- I will not treat your case as an emergency simply because you failed to plan. If I have to plan things for myself, I will not rearrange them to suit your emergencies.
- When all you think about is being rich so that you can spoil yourself, then you lack purpose. Be a better person. Think of all the ways you can help other people, and your life will have a purpose.
- You do not have to try to prove to anyone that you are wise, educated, rich or worthy. If you feel the need to, then you are not.
- You are the express image of your thoughts. Teach yourself to think right at all times.
- Take a look at your life, if you do not like it, change it. If you like it, there are better levels you can ascend to.
- Whatever you give out to the universe is what will come back to you. Give out positive vibes.
Funny Clever Quotes
These funny, clever quotes will crack your ribs as well as those that here them.
- There are so many fake people that being real is like being supernatural.
- Unless you are fifty years old and above, you are not yet wise! You will still make mistakes in your 40s that will teach you a lesson. When you are 50, what could you possibly do wrong? You are too old!
- If you want to know that you are clever, you will understand what a clever person says. If you want to know you are stupid, every stupid person will understand you.
- Why does it take a piece of paper and a few hours to prove that someone is not smart? Maybe if we did not have exams, we would all be geniuses.
- Do not worry about your kid not being number one in class. But be worried if they are not good in class, in sports, and in any art.
- Regardless of the age we are, we can get with a few stupid acts, decisions, or talks. But limit it to ‘a few.’ Do not abuse this grace and over exercise your stupidity privilege.
- A simple picture can speak volumes about anything. So pardon me if I never drop the habit of judging a book by its covers.
- Everyone loves to have rich friends around them. But make an effort not to be the poor friend
- A smile is contagious. Happiness is contagious. Cold is contagious, and some diseases are contagious. But trust me, success and prosperity are not. Get up and do something with your life.
- Do you know that what you earn is someone else’s payment for a meal? What you spend on shoes is someone else’s price for a whiskey bottle? Your house rent is what someone else spends on a designer dress? Do you know that what you spent to buy your classy car is what someone else spends on weekend getaways? Stay humble!
- Do you know that saying you love to sleep is saying you are secretly lazy? But do not worry. You can always say that sleep loves you.
- If I do not remember it happening, to me, I did not happen at all.
- You can know that you are not wise when you always have to tell people that you are. Blowing your own trumpet does not count.
- There is wisdom in silence, and sometimes it is clever to be silent than to talk. You will be shocked at how many stupid people play this card and pass off as clever and wise people.
- Do not sound wise in your silence only for you to confirm that you are not by talking.
Religious Funny Clever Quotes
Here are a few unique religious clever quotes that you can use to drive a point home.
- Do not tell me that you are a Christian because you go to church. You are not a house because you live in one. Give me something more!
- Do not use the fact that Jesus turned water into wine to get drunk. Do not behave as though you have never heard of non-alcoholic wine!
- There are many great women and men in the bible. Naming your child like them will not turn them to great men and women. Teaching them will!
- When things are blown out of proportion, remember the bible says our tongues can light a fire. Sit down and quench your tongue and the fire will cease.
- Patience is a virtue, but it does not imply you should be patient with mediocrity so forgive me if I lose my patience over mediocrity.
- Do you know that when life has brought you down to your knees, it has placed you in the best position to pray? Take advantage.
Now that you have these clever quotes to use, there is no reason why you should not use them on your day to day endeavors. These clever quotes will make you clever.
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